Bathing Suits, Chivalry, and Zanpakto's?
by XxMNinjaxX
Summary: A Mai-Hime Pool Party! Crack fic. Shiznat, Maiichi, Chie/Aoi. The cast of Mai-Hime have a night-swimming pool party at Reito's beach house/mansion! Set at the end of the Summer break that came after the Hime Carnival.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Mai-Hime! Masakazu Obara and Hiroyuki Yoshino do!**

**(Mai-Multiverse Main Submission**

**by ~SoccerHokage14)**

**Genres: Humor and Crack.**

"**Hello" indicates spoken words while **

'**Hello' indicates thoughts.**

*****This story is set at the end of the Summer break that came after the Hime Carnival. *****

**Note: I am not a Yuuichi hater. I totally love him, and I think he's an awesome guy! =] I'm just making him act silly because some writers sometimes make characters they like do goofy things. And I sometimes make their lives difficult (like in "50 Ways to Annoy Natsuki Kuga"). It's all because I love them! I sort of make it up to Natsuki by making her really cool in this story. I'll have to write a good Maiichi fanfic later, to make up for this fanfic (for Yuuichi). Anyways, (to the readers) don't take this story too seriously- just (at least try to) enjoy the irony and the ridiculousness! =]**

* * *

Bathing Suits, Chivalry, and…Zanpaktos? A Mai-Hime Pool Party! 

**CRACK! **In the darkness of the night, a soft, orange glow illuminated the face of Yuuichi Tate.

"This is going to be the best night swimming party ever!" the blond boy grinned as he held up the orange glow-stick he had just bent and illuminated.

"That's nice, Yuuichi, but would you mind getting your lazy butt over here and helping us unload the car?" Mai Tokiha grunted agitatedly, glaring at her brown-eyed boyfriend as she struggled to unload a massive suitcase from the trunk of a car. The violet-eyed teen took a step backward, almost tripping over the bottom stair of the steps that led to the beach house, and wobbling precariously back and forth.

The red-head's lavender eyes widened in panic.

"Yuui-!"

Before Mai could finish her sentence (and have her feet crushed by the suitcase that she was rapidly losing her hold on,) a soft, masculine voice chimed in,

"Allow me, Mai-san."

The owner of the voice caught the oversized suitcase in Mai's arms right before it fell out of the orange-haired girl's grip.

Gently taking the suitcase from Mai, Reito Kanzaki smiled charmingly at the lavender-eyed hime, who blushed in return. After a brief moment, the tall, dark-haired man stood up and turned his attention to Yuuichi, who stood a few feet away, staring, shocked, at the scene.

"You'd better pay more attention to your girlfriend, Tate-san," Reito smiled politely, raising his eyebrows at the surprised blond, "A lady like Mai-san shouldn't have to carry such heavy things."

With that, the gray-eyed college student smiled coolly, lifting the massive suitcase onto his shoulder with ease and walking up the steps to his extravagant beach mansion in which the Mai-Hime cast would be spending the next week of their summer vacation.

Yuuichi was about to shout an angry reply to the black-haired man (and demand that he give him back his girlfriend's suitcase), when an elegant voice drew the attention of the blond and his girlfriend in the other direction.

"Ara, Tate-kun…" Shizuru Fujino spoke, gracefully walking up behind the high school couple with a delicate hand placed over her smile.

"Reito-san is right. A lady shouldn't have to carry her own heavy suitcase…"

"Yeah," a gruff voice agreed, Natsuki Kuga walking up beside the ruby-eyed college student. The ice hime glared warningly at Yuuichi. "And if I ever see you not taking care of Mai again, there'll be hell to pay. Got it, sideburns?"

The emerald-eyed motorcycle rider gave a supportive nod to her best friend (the orange-haired girl replying with a return nod, a smile, and a "Thanks, Natsuki!"), and lifted two suitcases onto her shoulders: one suitcase a dark blue and the other, much larger suitcase, a deep purple. Natsuki glared at Yuuichi once more before turning back in the direction of the stairs and proceeding to ascend with the suitcases resting on her shoulders. Shizuru smiled at Yuuichi and Mai, following her navy-haired companion up the stairs, empty handed.

Her eyes wistfully watching the other teenagers walk up the stairs, Mai sighed. She turned back to face her boyfriend, who (completely missing the irony of the previous moment) had begun placing the orange glow-stick in a plastic hilt, making the glow-stick into a glowing sword. Yuuichi grinned proudly as he held up his newly assembled sword in the air.

Hanging her head with another sigh, the orange-haired girl mumbled exasperatedly to the blond man beside her,

"Come on…Let's go unpack…"

The violet-eyed teen slumped up the stairs, a depressing air almost visible as it hung over her like a dark cloud.

Mumbling to herself, Mai mused,

"Why do I have to be the only one with a lover who's completely inept in the ways of chivalry…?"

Hearing this (after finishing with assembling his glow-stick sword), Yuuichi turned his attention back to his girlfriend.

"What? Are you serious?! Mai, Wait!"

A short while later (after everybody in the Mai-Hime cast had unloaded the cars they had traveled to the beach mansion in, and unpacked their suitcases) the crew gathered by the pool for an arrival/night swimming party.

The house lights were turned off and the pool lights, as well as the decorative yard-lights lined around the perimeter of the backyard, were turned on.

A few cast members jumped immediately into the pool. Others stood around the edge of the pool, chatting, or sat in chairs socializing.

"Bubuzuke!"

Shizuru smiled at her blond friend. "Ah, Haruka-san, it's nice to see you. How was your and Yukino-san's ride here in your car?"

"Enough small talk, Bubuzuke. You'd better put some shaving cream on…"

"Sunscreen, Haruka-chan…"

"That's what I said! *Ahem* You'd better put some sunscreen on, Bubuzuke… You don't want to get burned when I beat you at looking great in a swim suit!"

"...Ara…"

Before Shizuru could reply to the competitive blond's challenge with a witty remark of her own, she was interrupted by a deep but feminine voice popping up beside her.

"Hey," Natsuki inquired innocently, "What are you guys talking about?"

The emerald-eyed hime handed her tawny-haired friend a drink she had just retrieved for her from the snack table across the backyard.

Haruka smiled confidently at the tawny and navy haired hime across from her, standing tall and proud as the blond woman always did.

"I was just telling Bubuzuke that she should get some shaving cream-"

"Sunscreen, Haruka-chan."

"That's what I-"

Her navy-colored eyebrows furrowing in honest confusion, Natsuki cut the blond woman off, looking up in confusion and concentration at the dark, sunless, night sky.

"What? Shizuru doesn't need to go get sunscreen. She doesn't need any. She's definitely doesn't have to worry about getting burned, that's for certain…" Natsuki replied as if she were saying the most obvious thing in the world.

At the innocent and unintentional (but nonetheless effective) put-down she had just received from the midnight-haired motorcycle rider, Haruka deflated.

"Come on, Yukino. Let's get some cake from the snack table…"

Haruka walked away, toward the other side of the yard.

After a brief moment of depression, the former head of the Executive Committee saw the humor in the situation and smiled to herself, chuckling good-naturedly. Turning back around, she shot her tawny-haired friend a grin. "Until next time, Bubuzuke!"

Shizuru responded with a genuine smile and a nod, glad that her friend had not taken the situation too seriously.

After watching the verbal as well as silent exchange, Natsuki raised a perplexed eyebrow at the backs of the retreating Haruka and Yukino. The green-eyed girl wondered what she had said to make the purple-eyed blond lose her competitive fire for the moment.

"Shizuru, what the heck just-"

As Natsuki turned inquiringly to her tawny-haired friend, she saw the smile on the college student's face and expression of genuine joy in her ruby-colored eyes.

'My Natsuki has been so wonderful today…If only I could reward her for her good deeds…' Shizuru thought, pondering a few possible ways she could reward the navy-haired girl.

Seeing the look of happiness on her close friend's face, Natsuki smiled genuinely as well, blushing and looking down in embarrassment and joy at the fact that she had been able to make the other girl smile so brightly (even if she didn't know exactly what she had said or done to achieve this feat).

As the dark-haired girl's emerald eyes looked down, they fell on the low-cut bikini top Shizuru had donned for the night, settling on what the skimpy piece of lavender material did (or rather did not) cover. After a moment of staring, spellbound, at Shizuru's barely-covered chest, Natsuki eyes widened in shock and her face flushed a dangerously dark shade of red upon realizing what she had just been doing.

'Holy crap! What the hell am I doing?! I haven't even asked Shizuru to be my girlfriend yet! I can't be doing perverted things like this!'

Averting her eyes and jumping back frantically, Natsuki searched for an excuse to run away.

"Oh, look! It's Mai!"

The forest-eyed girl sprinted off in the direction of her orange-haired friend.

'Ara…'

Shizuru stood gazing in shock after her (surprisingly fast) companion.

'So shy…'

(backward time skip)

As Shizuru and Natsuki were having their conversation with Haruka and Yukino, Mai Tokiha was struggling to tie up her hair while walking down the steps of the beach mansion's deck and to the backyard's pool area. The red-head was trying in vain to pull her hair into a ponytail while holding a large, air-filled pool raft.

A few steps behind Mai, Yuuichi Tate (after tearing his attention away from his glow-stick sword) had noticed his girlfriend's struggle. The brown-eyed man moved to gently take the large, bothersome pool raft out of his girlfriend's hands so he could carry it down the stairs for her, when a small blur raced past him.

"Hey, Mai! Let me carry that for ya'!"

Mikoto Minagi took the raft from the orange-haired girl's hands, a large grin on her child-like face. Patting the younger girl on the head approvingly, Mai smiled appreciatively at the spiky-haired hime.

"Thank you, Mikoto."

The purple-eyed girl's fond gaze turned to a glare of indignation as she turned her head, looking back at her boyfriend.

"At least somebody else here knows what chivalry is!"

"Hey! That's not fair!" Yuuichi defended himself, walking up beside Mai, "I went to take it for you, but Mikoto beat me to it!"

"Suuure, Yuuichi."

"Really!"

By that time, the bickering couple and oblivious, golden-eyed bystander had reached the bottom of the steps and arrived at the pool area. Before a more serious argument could start between Mai and Yuuichi, Mikoto's golden irises fell on the blond teenager's orange glow-stick sword.

"Woah! Cool! Can I have one, Yuuichi?!" Mikoto exclaimed, gesturing excitedly to the glowing toy.

"What?" Yuuichi said, confused, before following the spiky-haired girl's gaze to his glow-stick sword, "Oh…Oh! Sure!" he replied excitedly, glad that somebody else wanted to join in on the epicosity that is glow-stick swords.

"Yeah!" Mikoto shouted triumphantly as Yuuichi handed her a yellow glow-stick and plastic sword hilt, "Now I can battle Yuuichi for Mai like Renji will battle Ichigo for Rukia!"

"What? You like _Bleach_ too?" Yuuichi asked the young, black-haired hime, surprised that Mikoto had referenced one of his favorite animes.

"Yeah! I love it!"

Both toy sword-bearers grinned happily at each other as they began to engage in an animated discussion about the anime _Bleach_. Standing in front of the excited pair, Mai looked incredulously at them, her expression bland with exasperation.

"…Am I really this alone? This surrounded by immaturity? …Maybe I should have snagged Natsuki while I had the chance…"

(Time Skip Ends)

Speaking of the navy-haired girl…

"Oh, look! It's Mai!"

Natsuki ran up beside her orange-haired friend, looking questioningly at the conversing Yuuichi and Mikoto in front of them.

"Woah, what are you guys talking about?"

"_Bleach_," Yuuichi said with a smile.

"Sorry, Natsuki, "Mai quickly apologized for her boyfriend, her forehead creased in irritation, "It's just some stupid anime."

The violet-eyed girl turned, giving Yuuichi a stern look.

"Real adults don't watch stupid things like-"

"Yeah!" Mikoto cut in, ignoring Mai's previous comment, "We were talking about how Renji will fight Ichigo for Rukia!"

Mai was about to chastise Mikoto as well, but didn't have the chance, as Natsuki's surprisingly quick reply came,

"No way! Ichigo/Uuryu is the obvious couple in the show. Ichigo would have no reason to fight Renji after the Soul Society battle…"

All three members of the conversation that were not Natsuki stared at the motorcycle-rider blankly, not really believing what they had just heard.

"…What?..." the midnight-haired rebel said with a suspicious frown.

"N…Natsuki…you like that anime too?" Mai asked incredulously.

"Yeah. What's so bad about that?" Natsuki replied casually, raising an eyebrow.

"Natsuki! We're in high school!" Mai cried almost desperately, "We need to focus on serious things like school work and social lives!"

"Yeah, "Natsuki answered, still casual, "and I manage both of those. What's wrong with me liking _Bleach_ too?"

"Thank you," Yuuichi agreed with the emerald-eyed girl, giving a pointed look at his orange-haired girlfriend.

"But we need to be more mature!" Mai cried again.

Suddenly, behind the lavender-eyed girl, Aoi Senou ran by… with white cake frosting smeared all over her face.

"Ahh!" the blue-eyed brunette squealed, looking over her shoulder with a smile as she ran, "Chie! Stop!"

A split second later, Chie Harada ran by in the same direction, a decent-sized piece of cake held in her hand.

"No way, Aoi!" Chie laughed as she chased her girlfriend, "This is a food fight! There's no mercy until I get cake all over you!"

With that reply, the charcoal-haired girl tossed her handful of cake at the blue-eyed high school student, the sugary dessert landing and splattering all over Aoi's shoulder and exposed upper-chest.

"Ahh! Chie!"

Squeals and laughter could be heard as the pair ran around the backyard of the mansion.

"Attention, everybody!" Reito called casually into a hand-held megaphone from his comfortable seat in a pool chair, "No jumping into the pool until you've cleaned any and all food off of yourself!"

After the announcement was made, Reito calmly put down the megaphone and resumed the conversation he'd been having with Akira and Takumi, who sat together on the chair beside him.

Taking in the exchange that had just occurred before her, Mai stared blankly at the yard full of her peers. After a long moment of tense, suspenseful silence, the purple-eyed hime finally spoke.

"That's it, I give up," Mai said bluntly, tossing her hands in the air in surrender. She walked to Yuuichi and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"Be however you want to be from now on. Immature, mature, observant, oblivious, a responsible boyfriend, a kendo Soul Reaper or whatnot… I don't care. I'm going swimming."

With that, the orange-haired hime removed her cover-up dress, walked to the edge of the pool's deep end, and jumped in.

Yuuichi, Mikoto, and Natsuki stared at their friend in disbelief.

After a moment, Yuuichi turned to the two hime beside him.

"Wanna' enjoy the pool?" he asked with a shrug.

"Yeah!"

"Sure."

And with that, the three friends of Mai followed the violet-eyed girl's example and jumped into the pool.

The rest of the night was filled with laughter, more food fights, glow-sword stick battles for the status of Mai's boyfriend/girlfriend, Natsuki threatening to drown Yuuichi in the pool if he didn't promise to seriously take good care of Mai (to which the blond man, a tad fearfully, and sincerely honestly, consented to), Natsuki apologizing to Shizuru for being so awkward earlier, Shizuru forgiving Natsuki and making her blush (multiple times), and the Chinese-takeout delivery man accidently delivering 30 "gastric bypass chicken parts" (instead of 30 garlic and broccoli chicken plates) after speaking on the phone with Haruka.

All in all, it was a really awesome pool party.


End file.
